A Shortie: Number 3

After a long day at work, Dan stood at the kitchen sink washing the last of the pots from the evening meal.  His two youngest children, ages 3 and 4, had finished eating but the oldest, 6 years old, picked at her food again.  She repeated this every meal and her younger siblings jeered and cajoled in frustration.  They couldn’t watch television until everyone was finished with supper.

Absent mindedly washing, Dan noticed a full moon rising.  Perhaps it was exhaustion, sleep had eluded him all week, but he was transported to his high school and college days.  Instantly, a thought hit him and his snickered.  His number two child asked, “What’er you laughin’ at daddy?”

“Come ‘eer an’ I’ll show ya.”

The two youngest hopped from their chairs and ran to their father.  The oldest child continued sitting in her chair with her back to everyone.  Dan called, “You too, Libby.”  A smile broke through her stoic façade as she spun around and joined her siblings. 

Dan asked, “Do ya see the moon out there?”

“Yeah.”  Yes, daddy.” “Uh, huh.” They replied.

“Is it a full moon?”

In unison they responded, “No.”

“Ya wanna see a full moon?”

There was confused silence until the oldest said, “Yes.”  Then the other children added their affirmations.

“Ok all y’all stand here an looky out the window.  In a minute, all y’all ‘ill see a full moon.”

Obediently, the three children stood looking at the moon through the window.  Dan stepped behind the children and loosened his pants as his wife walked into the kitchen.  Her face registered bewilderment as she struggled to understand his actions.  Then she recognized the look on his face and body language.  She gave him a look that should have stopped him but it was too late.  Dan dropped his drawers exposing his white buttocks.  Then he said, “Ok, all y’all turn around.”

The children turned to see their father shaking his behind at them.  Dan called, “Here’t is.  A full moon.”  The youngest son laughed though none of the youngsters understood their father’s actions.  Finally, Dan said, “Whin ya show off yer butt like this, they call it a full moon.”

All three children were suddenly laughing and mooning one another.  Dan’s wife shot him her “You-are-going-to-regret-this look but Dan was enjoying the moment with his children. 

After the children were tucked into bed, Dan began to leave the room when his son called, “Daddy!”  Dan turned to see him shaking his bare buns back and forth.  Then the girls joined and all laughed heartily.  That night was the best sleep of the week for Dan.