My Reach Must Go Beyond My Grasp

My heart is full of sorrow and I write to sort my feelings.  I believe God places people in your life for a reason.  I believe there is a higher purpose to everything and God can be found even in the stupid, mundane events of life.

In my last short story, Shorties:  Number 26, I shared a true experience I had with a coworker.  I have had similar happenings since then.  A childhood friend had a stroke.  There is also a former coworker who has had so many health issues over the last 6-7 years, at one point she received chemotherapy, even though cancer is not in her body.  The amazing thing there is she said the chemo made her feel better. 

I care deeply for people and acknowledge I get overwhelmed when things like this happen.  Too many things to pray about make me shut down.  Also, when I interact with people in life or death circumstances, I can’t ignore the obvious.  I can’t sit, smile and say things will be ok.  If you believe in an afterlife and you are going to heaven then things will be ok in the end.  Still, we are here on this earth and heaven always seems far off even if we are moments away from the other side of the veil. 

So I’m stuck in this agony of wanting to make a difference in situations where I am helpless.  I cannot wave my hand and everything will be right.  My impotence mocks me when I wish to offer hope to my friends.  If you were to talk to me in a situation like this, I prefer you tell me the truth rather than offer something weak and useless. 

What am I really saying when they’ve been given an expiration date and I’m trying to give hope?  I want my words to be words of power and change.  I want to give words of life but what words are life when it comes to death?

Yes, I believe God has the last say in these matters.  I know people who lived years beyond what doctors told them was possible.  In these moments of trial can God use my lips and speak words we can’t deny?  Can such utterances make a difference if God can use this jar of clay?  I must hope in this because the best I can ever offer lacks.  More and more I’m coming to grips that while I’m on this planet, I can never measure up in ways this world needs.  I must rely on a God in heaven because only He can supply what this world needs as we rush around trying to satisfy our thirst. 

Man is not perfect. We expose our flaws daily.  It is at times like these I want to tap into the supernatural.  My reach must go beyond my grasp.