The Blind Beggar: Part XXVIII

Later that day when Boulos had some time, he went to the website Rima sent to him.  He looked at the writer’s profile which simply said she was “a mother, daughter and widow who loves to meet people and share my love for sunsets.”  There was no picture of the author.  There were no pictures on the blog at all.  This disappointed Boulos.  Still, he felt her a humble person.  He was about to look at the blog when the phone rang.  The remainder of the evening required his attention on other matters.  Before he knew it, it was time for bed and Boulos wanted to read scripture before sleeping.  Therefore, he did not read the blog that night. 

Amal added three sunset descriptions before Boulos revisited the blog.  At the time, his mind was preoccupied.  While he liked the descriptions, he found himself wanting to see a picture of what she saw.  Then his phone buzzed.  It was a text from Charles.  Rima wanted to know his opinion of the blog.  Boulos replied,

“The writer is very descriptive of the sunsets but I wish she had photographs so I can see what she saw.”

          “Why?”

“Perhaps I because I was blind and wanted to actually see sunsets.”

“That makes sense”
“I guess”
“Rima loves her descriptions.”
“Maybe you should read a little, close your eyes and see the way you used to see them.”

“Yes, I will try that.”

Boulos then read the next twilight description.  After each line he closed his eyes and focused on the words.  His mind highlighted the play of words as they painted the sky of his mind.  The sky of his eyes was pale in comparison.  Slowly, a dazzling arrangement met him.  His pulse quickened.  The words spoke to him.  They was a voice calling to him. 

In his mind’s eye, Boulos heard children playing, sea birds flying above and the voice of Amal whispering to him.  His eyes opened and reality broke the spell.  A profound sadness enveloped him and tears welled up.  Boulos believed it was due to memories of being blind. 

Blindness was a curse but it had moments of blessing.  Blindness made him more in tune with the world around him.  Sometimes when he was alone, his senses saw the whole world around him.  He absorbed elements those with sight never see. 

He spoke aloud to no one, “Oh my Amal I miss you.  I miss you.  I’m sorry our lives were so different.  How I wish I could have held you in my arms.  How I wish I could have protected you from the terrors of life.  How I wish…”  He paused.  “How I wish things were different.  I am nobody.  Your father did what was right.  He loved you and wanted you to have a good future.  But God has a plan for both of us.  It is for our welfare and not for calamity so we can have a future and a hope.”

He sniffed then continued, “Oh my Amal.  In my heart, there is no one else but you.  So I will remain as I am.”  Boulos frowned, took a deep breath and exhaled.  He no longer desired to read about sunsets and closed the browser on his iPad.