He paused for a moment. He would say the words that were hard to say. He would submit to God’s will. “If it is Your will that this is our last contact, I will again let her go. God, I love her but she is not mine. She is yours. I will not covet. I will not try to force something that cannot be. Your will be done.”
He picked up his iPad and typed, “My Amal, this is
Boulos. I want you to know I did not
seek you out. I will do nothing to try
to steal you from your husband, children and life. It is an amazing thing that I found your
blog. Can you believe the miracle, I can
see again? Ms. Rima told me about your
wonderful sunset descriptions and I started reading them. You know the rest.”
Boulos sent this.
Then he added, “After reading your sunsets I was so sure it was you and
I had to ask. I hope you are not mad at
me. As I said, I will not be a problem
and I will never contact you again if that is what you want. I am sorry if I have upset you.”
With this reply sent, Boulos sat in his chair
flooded with emotions. It was a mixture
of joy and dread. He was elated to find
his love but now feared her rejection.
Therefore, he steeled his heart for Amal’s rejection. Then a paralyzing thought hit him. What if she never replied? What if Amal blocked him? Even if they never spoke again, he had to
read her words and know she was the one who painted such symphonic sonnets
every day. Boulos simply had to be a
part of that. In his emotional state, he
cried anew. This fear gripped him. He fell to his bed in agony. God couldn’t be so cruel could He? Then Boulos realized he was worrying about
things he couldn’t control. He would no
longer think such thoughts. He would
simply wait. If he waited until he died,
he would wait and never waiver in his love.
Then he pictured the story of the Prodigal
Son. He imagined himself as the father
waiting for his son to return home. He
would wait until Amal returned to him.
And even if she never did return, he would learn how to love her
more.
Amal had several more comments to read through and
the hour was getting late. Though her
eyes were heavy, she hoped to learn who it was that knew Boulos. Could it be one of her siblings playing a
joke on her? Amal couldn’t imagine
anyone else who would know him. There were a few other playmates when she was
young but they never knew she described sunsets to Ali. Amal could imagine her youngest brother
laughing at her after revealing himself as the instigator of this ruse and felt
the urge to choke him. Little brothers
can be such a pain even when they are grown up.
She cleared her queue and refreshed the inbox. There were two more messages. Amal clicked on the oldest one. Shock and disbelief jolted her. Amal wanted to believe what she read but it was
too good to be true. Her Ali can see
again? It can’t be true. It was impossible. Who could be so cruel? How could anyone say such things? To what purpose was such spitefulness? Who had she wronged?
Venom laced daggers were only the beginning of the
tortures Amal planned for the message sender.
To calm herself, she moved on to the next message. Hearing her brother’s voice, she read, “After
reading your sunsets I was so sure it was you and I had to ask. I hope you are not mad at me.” She said aloud, “Oh I am pissed at you you
little rat!”
Her brother’s voice faded as she read, “I hope you
are not mad at me. As I said, I will not
be a problem and I will never contact you again if that is what you want. I am sorry if I have upset you.”
Her heart softened.
This couldn’t be her brother. Was
this really her Ali? Yes, he did upset
her. She was terribly upset but what if
it were true? What if this is her
Ali? It had to be him but she couldn’t
trust just yet. She had to test this
person.
She replied, “If you are Boulos, what did I call
you and what did you say to me when we last met?”